Tag Archives: My Life

Welcome to London 51.5171° N, 0.1062° W

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I’m sick of it. I swear, if one more foreigner complains about the weather in the UK, I might just scream. We know that when it’s summer it should be sunny and warm. We understand that you are unhappy with the unpredictable nature of the weather. We don’t like it either. We also realise, that where you come from has much better weather. Bully for you. You do understand that we have no control over our weather patterns, right? If you persist with your complaining we may just forcefully kick your butt back to whichever utopian paradise you claim as your own.Usain Bolt was recently asked what he thought of the UK. “It’s alright, apart from the weather”, he said. Thanks for that Usain.

It’s a bit like me saying that Jamaica is alright apart from the poverty and fear of violent crime. Continue reading →

Hammer Time!

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The ski jump at Lillehammer

Tour of southern Norway

Once again I embarked on a road trip with my travelling companion Big Boy; this time in Norway, starting in Oslo. Of course, the first thing to ensure when travelling, is that you actually take a flight that lands in your destination city. Not to take a budget airline flight that lands somewhere amongst a thicket of trees, somewhere near a reindeer farm… 1.75 hours away from Oslo. Torp airport is so quiet that the ‘express’ bus to Oslo actually waits for the Ryanair flight to land before setting off! Continue reading →

Pretend Olympic VIPs

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The start of the 400m hurdles from ‘our’ seats

Regular readers will be aware of my recent delight at having obtained a ticket for the Olympic athletics this week. My regular travel buddy Big Boy saw fit to offer me the much sought after ticket once his first choice declined his offer… And his second choice failed to come back to him. I guess that makes me the bronze choice?

This wasn’t the first Olympic event for either of us. I had attended four, so I was conscious that it was likely that we could ‘upgrade’: locate some empty seats and pretend that they were ours. Until the ticket holders turned up Continue reading →

Getting into the Olympic Spirit

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Shock at the Olympic torch relay in London, as an innocent man’s head is set alight in an unprovoked attack

I’ve already made my feelings clear about what I feel is the over-commercialisation and money-grabbing attitude of the London 2012™ Olympics in a previous post. From the ridiculous complicated ticketing process, to the draconian legislation relating to the use of certain key words and phrases for marketing purposes, including the removal of company logos from toilets! It just didn’t seem like the true Olympic spirit.

It’s not that I wasn’t looking forward to the sporting spectacle. There’s nothing I appreciate more than the sight of intensely toned athletes, exerting every last ounce of energy, Continue reading →

The Terrible Twos

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When I started this blog in July 2010, I had no idea how long it would interest me and whether it would be popular. Yet here I sit, heading into the third year of its existence and I still manage to find the time and the inspiration to write.

Regular readers will have noticed a trend over the last 10 months. The posts have gone from twice a week to once a week, if that. The truth is, that having taken on additional study, I just haven’t had the time to ponder life’s curiosities and start typing. I already endeavour to lead life to the fullest, so in my busy calendar, I guess something had to give.

One thing that hasn’t changed is my editorial philosophy: quality, not quantity… although I’m sure some may dispute the level of quality! But that’s just a matter of taste. Continue reading →

Sit Back and Enjoy a Vindapoo

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This house comes with full ‘natural fibre’ insulation.

The Unexpected Reality of House Hunting

Once again I am on the lookout for a new place to live. And, as before, it seems that the cost of living in London continues to rise, faster than a cheetah on steroids. A classic case of supply and demand. Or just plain greed. But no matter, armed with the knowledge that I will have to pay at least £700 per month for a flat that makes the homes in Hobbiton look spacious, I recently began the painstaking search for a new place to call… the money pit home.

But of course, all is not as it appears. What looks like a value-for-money, too-good-to-be-missed dream home, often turns out to be something quite different. Continue reading →

Umbrellas: the New Penis Extension?

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“What a beauty. It’s a top of the range model with enough room for three chicks“

After the well publicised ‘drought’ of the previous 18 months, the UK has recently been experiencing what can only be referred to as payback. Quicker than you can say “fix the leaks you profit-guarding water fascists” we’ve experienced the highest amount of rainfall recorded, since Noah had the foresight to build an ark and float around for a while. And that’s a fact.

During these last couple of months I have noticed a new phenomenon whilst frantically trying to shield myself from the inclement weather, wondering why my £5 pop-up umbrella isn’t wind-proof, and also seems to be porous. There seem to be many men, Continue reading →