This week we had a revelation. The UK’s crappest town 2013 was announced… as LONDON. Yes, that’s right, one of the world’s great super-cities, a hub for finance, fashion, the arts, sport and jellied eels was voted for as being the worst part of the UK to live in. Clearly, by village idiots.
Now there are a number of things obviously wrong with this award. Firstly, it is quite apparent to anyone with a rudimentary grasp of geography, that London is a huge, sprawling metropolis. It is not really a town, as such. If you don’t like one part of London, then you really only need to cross a road or two to find a borough more to your liking.
Similarly, the morons who voted for this award also didn’t seem to comprehend that Gibraltar is not actually part of the UK, as it also made the top six. Presumably, they must have travelled there for it to have met with their disapproval, so how the hell did they not realise that they flew over France and Spain before landing?
But, putting aside these technicalities, it seems that there is some genuine hated of London by inhabitants of the UK. So why is this? Can a record 16 million annual tourists be wrong? Of course, there are rough areas with little charm, but how can you tar the whole of London with the same brush?
If you live in Hackney, you will undoubtedly have a different life experience than if you live in Chelsea. In the latter, you will quite possibly drive an expensive 4×4 that has never been taken off-road, apparently because you have children and ‘need’ the space (just how big are your kids?!). Whereas in Hackney, you will simply be glad that your beaten up Nissan Micra still has wheels in the morning.
It’s certainly true that commuting in the rush hour is something akin to hell on Earth, especially during the warmer summer months. But this can be avoided. I cycle or jog to work, or take a bus.
So why dwell on the bad points? The massive plus points of London surely trump London’s minor irritations, which may seem horrible to an outsider, but really don’t take too long to get used to. Many major cities have similar, and often much worse problems.
The reasons why so many people move to London are the career opportunities, higher income, top class sport and world-class social life. You should have no excuse to be too skint to make the most of these, and you certainly should not get bored with what’s on offer, you just need to embrace the variety that’s on offer.
As for voting for London to win the UK’s crappiest town award, if you did that then I suggest that you take off your blinkers and take a long hard look at where you live. Sure, it may be a nice town by the beach or in the countryside, but is that where it’s benefits end? Time to put aside your petty jealousy and big city prejudices.